When I was born, they looked at me and said, "What a good boy, what a smart boy, what a strong boy."
And when you were born, they looked at you and said, "What a good girl, what a smart girl, what a pretty good."
We've got these chains that hung around our necks
people want to strangle us with them before we take our first breath.
Afraid of change, afraid of staying the same
when temptation calls, we just look away
This name is the hairshirt I wear
and this hairshirt is woven from your brown hair.
This song is the cross that I bear,
bear it with me, bear with me, bear with me, be with me tonight
I know that it isn't right, but be with me tonight
I got to school, I write exams,
if I pass, if I fail, if I drop out,
does anyone give a damn?
And if they do, they'll soon forget 'causeit won't take much for me
to show my life ain't over yet
I wake up scared, I wake up strange
I wake up wondering if anything in my life is ever going to change
I wake up scared, I wake up strange
and everything around my stays the same
This name is the hairshirt I wear
and this hairshirt is woven from your brown hair.
This song is the cross that I bear,
bear it with me, bear with me, bear with me, be with me tonight
I know that it isn't right, but be with me tonight
I couldn't tell you that I was wrong,
chickened out, grabbed a pen and paper and I wrote this song
I couldn't tell you that you were right,
so instead I looked in the mirror,
watched TV, laid away all night
We've got these chains hung 'round our necks,
people want to strangle us with them before we take our first breath.
Afraid of change, afraid of staying the same when temptation calls...
When I was born, they looked at me and said;
"What a good boy, what a smart boy, what a strong boy,"
And when you were born, they looked at you and said; "What a good girl, what a smart girl, what a pretty girl, hey."
~Barenaked Ladies, "What a Good Boy"

***

It wasn't supposed to go this far.

You were supposed to stop me, turn me away. I WANTED you to turn me away. Why couldn't you have just done something? Why did you let me in so easily?

I wish you'd have put up more of a fight.

I know how relationships like ours end. They only end in pain, bloody, tear-out-your-heart-and-stick-it-in-a-blender type pain. And yet we both want it so badly, we're willing to risk it all.

We're crazy.

We're in love.

***

"Jiri."

I looked up from my newspaper. You peered over the back of your airplane seat, dark eyes staring at me through a mop of unruly brown hair.

"What is it Max?" I asked, softly, folding up the Czech newspaper.

"I bored. You have ideas for what I can do?" you asked, in that funny accent of yours.

I looked over at your plane ride partner, Pavel Datsyuk. Pavel was listening to headphones. Tapping him on the shoulder, I said very loudly, "Hey Pavs, why don't you do something with Max?"

Pavel's dark eyes squinted, as he processed my words. After a few minutes, he said, squinting his eyes, "I not understand."

You snorted, giving Pavel a friendly punch on the shoulder. "You understand just fine, Pavlusha. You just being jerk."

"Not jerk," said Pavel, frowning. "Want to sleep." He put his headphones back on and began to hum softly, closing his eyes.

You looked back at me, eyes widening with hope. "You do something with me? Is long time to Los Angeles, no?"

I nodded. "You're right Max, it's a long time to LA." I patted the empty spot beside me. "Why don't you come sit by me and let Pavs listen to his CDs."

You eagerly scampered out of your seat and flopped into the seat beside me, holding your hands in your lap and fiddling with your thumbs. "So."

"So?" I asked.

You thought for a second, before responding. "Games? You bring games?" You make little machine gun noises. "You bring Gameboy?"

I shook my head, smiling. "Sorry Max. I don't own Gameboy. Brett own Gameboy."

You frowned, letting out a puff of breath, blowing your dark bangs off of your forehead. "Oh. We not have anything to do then?"

I nodded. "That's right..." I looked at my watch. 'Another hour...' I looked at you and smiled. "Only an hour, Kuzie."

You bobbed your head, picking at a loose thread unraveling from the sleeve of your gray sweater. "Hour is not long time, no?"

"Relatively speaking." I shoved my newspaper back into my knapsack and sighed, stretching out my legs the best I could.

"Good then," you said, firmly. "I need use bathroom, and I don't trust those little toilets."

You let out an unhappy grunt, puckering your face into a distasteful grimace.

I began to laugh, my eyes tearing. "Aw, don't do that, Kuzie," I laughed, wiping my eyes. "Stop making that stupid face."

You did it again, that funny face. "This?"

"Stop it, Max!" I cried.

You grinned, enjoying pushing my buttons and, God help me, I was enjoying it too. "You not stop me! I do anything I want!" You pressed your face near mine, still scowling.

I began to giggle, shoving you away. Someone in the back of RedBird II coughed, loudly. "Sounds like someone's having too much fun up there." It was Hull.

"It's nothing, Hully," I said, giving you an elbow in the side.

"Suuure," said Hull. "Looks like Kuznetsov is trying to kiss you."

My eyes snapped open in horror. Your face was mere inches away from mine, and I could feel your breath on my neck, smell your cologne in my clothes. "Max, cut it out." I gave you another shove.

"Rawr!" you growled, tickling me mercilessly. "I make you go pee in your pants, Fishy?"

"Oh no," groaned Yzerman from somewhere in front. "Please make them stop."

You grabbed onto my thigh, laughing, giving it a squeeze. "You are not thinking about plane ride now, no?" you'd asked.

I could only shake my head, laughing too hard...and savoring the feel of your hand on my thigh.

Fics | Part 2