***Boyd's POV***

I think he knows.

It was all going so WELL, I was dealing with the fact that I love Steve but he'll never love me back. I was controlling myself so very well. Then, he got hurt and...I don't know what happened. I guess I got scared or something, but when he came back, I just couldn't keep my eyes off him for fear that if I did, he would disappear again. It felt a lot like my first days as a Wing, when I thought I was going to wake from a dream at any moment. Steve was all I could think about. I think he figured it out.

He won't look at me anymore. We’ve been in the locker room for an hour now, and he keeps averting his eyes from me. He must think I'm so sick. I really think this ranks up with severe concussions on the Really-Bad-Things scale. At least with the concussions I had a doctor to help me out. I'm pretty much on my own for this one.

This whole mess sounds so cheesy, like something you'd see on a soap opera, except that this is really happening. Plus, everything on TV has a nice, easy ending, and I just don’t see that happening here. This situation is too screwed-up to end happily.

Dammit, I'm getting all emotional here in the locker room. That too is a Bad Idea. People tend to notice when you start crying while changing your clothes. I take a few deep breaths, willing myself to gain control of my emotions. Finally, I calm down, start to think clearly.

A loud whistle calls everyone's attention to the front to the room, where Scotty Bowman is standing. We all get quiet as our coach explains the lines and strategies for the game. None of it is a surprise and I think Sean Avery, eager to please and to prove that he was worth putting Gilchrist on waivers for, is the only one paying full attention. We all have other things to concentrate on, eleven people are thinking about the Olympics, Draper is thinking of his pregnant wife, and the rest of us, except Sean, are thinking about how nice Orlando will be for the mini-camp.

Hey, that's right, we have the mini-camp coming up. A week and a half off from spending nearly every day trying to conceal my racing heart every time I see Steve. Maybe that's what I need, some time away to come back to my senses and realize that I'm just being stupid for pining over the captain.

"Hey Boyd..." A finger pokes me in the ribs.

I turn my head and see Mathieu Dandenault standing next to me. "Hey Dandy."

He smiles. "So, you got a room mate for Orlando yet?"

I shake my head. "Why? You still trying to hook Fish up with someone?" Dandy was the self-appointed room mate matchmaker. If someone couldn't find a room mate on their own, they went to him.

"No, actually now that Pavel is going to the Olympics, Max needed a room mate so I stuck Fish with him." His smile gets a little wider. "Actually, I need a room mate for myself."

I tilt my head. "I thought you were rooming with Aves." Dandy looks away, muttering something. "What’s that, I can't hear you."

He turns red. "I said I'm not ALLOWED to room with Aves anymore."

I can't keep from snickering. "Why not?"

He crosses his arms in anger. "Apparently we made too much noise the last time we roomed together. I think we also aren’t allowed to be in the same room after midnight." He shakes his head. "So, you up for it, or do I have to go spend my vacation rooming with," he shudders, "Duchense?"

"I HEARD THAT!" Steve Duchense yells from across the room.

I roll my eyes. "I'm too nice of a guy to leave you to that. Sure, we can room together. It might actually be fun."

Any further discussion is cut off by the start of the pre-game skate. We go out and beat Minnesota, with Dom earning a shut-out in the process. It was a great game to go into the break with, and the post-game locker room environment reflects that. There was a lot of hugging and good-byes, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw Steve working his way around the room, saying good bye to everyone.

Before I know it, he's standing in front of me. "Hey Boyd."

I lick my lips nervously. "Hey. Good luck. Win for Canada, eh?"

He laughs. "I'm hoping to." He hugs me quickly. "Bye."

I don’t know how I manage not to pass out or freeze up or start humping Steve's leg, but I squeak out, "Bye." And then Steve walks away.

I hope this vacation works, because I don't know how much longer I can go on like this.

Ooh, I wish I could tell somebody
But there's no one to talk to, nobody knows
I've got a crush on you
A crush on you, I got a crush
- Mandy Moore, "Crush"

Part 2 | Part 4